John x Onesided!Reader - Spare Me The Pain 01

John Egbert was an average high-schooler at an average school.

You liked to think that you were the same, although you weren't nearly as well accepted by the peers in your current environment.

But you were happy.

You and John were friends, and he had introduced you to a girl by the name of Jade Harley.
She was very similar to you, and you both hit it off instantly.

Every day, you would spend your free time being around John and Jade as much as you could.
Although it was kind of hard, because you didn't share many lessons with John - and none at all with Jade.

But you did also share a lot of lessons with someone called Dave, and you were soon friends.

However, you couldn't understand why John found Dave sort of annoying.
You thought his humour was great and that he had a lot in common with you - he was just another fun friend.

Life was finally starting to look up.


You knew that you had issues.
And you knew that it would be a long time before you will even think about conquering them.
That was just who you were, at the end of the day.

Sure, you were a negative person.
Someone who had only a few interests, but you were very passionate about them.

But who could blame you?
You wouldn't wish what you've been through on your worst enemies.

You understood why, though.
And unlike a lot of people, you accepted this.

Because you had them.

John and Jade were your precious friends.
Their interests were the same as yours, which was rare amongst recent society.
They meant the world to you, and they seemed to understand your turmoil.

They would go to such great lengths to cheer you up, instead of abandoning you.

Like everyone else.

You were finally content in life.

For the first time in a long while.


Recently though, things had suddenly become rocky between you and Jade.
She had started acting petty, and seemed to be a completely different person - which was quite a shock.
You had been so used to Jade and how she displayed herself, you were starting to get worried.

But you hoped things would be better when you visited her house.

You couldn't be any more wrong.

Jade had adapted herself to your strong love for video games, which were even stronger than John's.
You two were forever arguing over which games were better and who was better overall.

It was very amusing for Jade to watch the two of you, and she did play a few games - including some of the ones you enjoy.

On the day you went to her house, you two decided upon a recent fighting game, that you both were really bad at.
To be fair, so was John, but he had cheats and it was no fun with him.

During the visit, you figured you would make the fight more interesting by giving yourself a disadvantage against her.
You were sure that you wouldn't beat her anyway, Jade had spent ages making her team be effective.

Though...
...You were eventually winning?!

You couldn't believe how lucky you had been during the match, and how you were looking forward to sweeping her team.
You had never been good at this game - or anything for that matter.

This match meant too much to you.

You weren't going to lose this.

One of your two characters was just about to deliver the final blow to the last member she had left, when suddenly-

"Jade has forfeited the match."

You were going to scream.
You could never stop reminding yourself how bad you were.
You having so much fun, and you just so close to proving how good you were.

Until she snatched it away.

You had lost all hope.
You knew you were bad at everything.

There was nothing you could do.

Except laugh it off with a little tease, like usual.

Even though you were friends, you could never let either Jade or John see you truly depressed.



It wasn't your fault if she didn't understand.

If she couldn't pick up on your grin when lying.
If she didn't hear your sarcasm.

She made an excuse and left you by yourself.
A part of you believed she would come back - which was why you didn't leave.

She didn't make the effort to even say goodbye when you finally went home.

Who cared if she said sorry?
She had to understand that what she did was wrong.

In a way, you were sorry that the word 'sorry' wasn't good enough for you any more.

After all, actions speak louder than words.


The next day, you had turned to John for comfort, laughing it off once more as a petty argument because she was a sore loser.
Because that was the truth.

He agreed with your side, and assured you that you would soon be friends with Jade again.
Due to your past, you spoke your mind.

You didn't care either way.
She needed you; more than you needed her.

Because that was the truth.


Jade did eventually come crawling to your usual hang-out spot, making sure not to make eye contact with you and signals to John for a chat.
He was determined to sort this situation out, so he left without a complaint.

And he didn't come back.

You saw him again later that day, and you smiled and joked around with him like usual - but John was acting serious.
Shaking it off, you continued your jokes until it was obvious that you were interrupting whatever he kept trying to tell you.

He tells you to apologise.

You look confused, but then continue your conversation beforehand.
You hadn't done anything wrong.

However this time, he cuts into what you were saying - clearly angry.

He tells you that you put down others to make yourself feel better.
He tells you that you are too negative, and that you hate everything.
He tells you that you've picked up too many bad habits from being alone.

He tells you that you need to change, before they could accept your apology.

And you break.

He acts like a jerk and makes fun of everyone, but when you tease him to have a laugh, he's way too sensitive.
He's a huge suck up and everybody dislikes him for it.
He thinks he's smart but his grades are lower than average.
His hobbies are outdated and he constantly pokes fun at yours.

How dare he tell you to change, when you were fine with who you were for once.
He needs to take a good look at himself before expecting you to change.

You managed to stop hating yourself as much.
You managed to stop doubting who you are.
You managed to stop telling yourself how pathetic you are.

You never even thought to point out his flaws, because you accepted who he was.


Nobody is perfect.


And, to be honest, you loved him for it.


Unable to handle this, you dash away to get home as quickly as you could.
But John easily caught up to you, and pulled you back.

"You need to understand-" he yells.


You were stupid to believe that these people were your friends.
You were too naive to think it would last.

You couldn't stop laughing and hating their very being.


Interrupting his awful words, you shove him off of you and continue home.

"Why can't you just spare me the pain already?!"